Are we Really Dedicated to Our Creative Lives?

Are you fully committed to this creative life you want to have? Are you 100% vested?

I thought I was for the last ten years of my life as I worked toward where I am today, but I asked myself the question over the last few weeks? What is it that I really, really wanted to do with this creative life of mine? What has called me to my life purpose? Well there are many things but the one thing that I always came back to was writing.

I was so afraid of having no money that I kept chasing the dollar versus chasing my dreams and doing whatever it took to accomplish them.

As I study Elizabeth Gilbert's book, Big Magic - she speaks of taking "The Vow."  Much like a nun or a priest takes a vow to serve God in that particular vocation. Have we taken The Vow with our writing, our painting, our sculpting, our blogging? our businesses?  Businesses?  Did you find that odd that I included that?

Well, to many people,creating a business is an art form and are as dedicated to it as artists are to their craft.

As I pondered this question and went into my meditations with that in my mind, everything became very clear. I must write and I must publish, no matter what.  I made a decision to have this be the forefront of my life and I made a promise and intended that I would find a way to financially support my writing life and myself.  No matter what I had to do.

Yes, this is a very different life than I had one year ago, but I wake up everyday, looking forward to taking pen in hand and letting the words flow to me. It's the first thing I think about in the morning and it's the last thing I think about before I go to bed.

Here is a quote from this chapter in her book,

                        I did not ask for any external reward for my devotion; 

                            I just wanted to spend my life as near to writing as possible- 

                                     forever close to that source of all my curiosity 
                   
                       and contentment - and so I was willing to make whatever 

                                 arrangements needed to be made in order to get by.  

Commit to your dreams my friends! Do not let them die with you!

Kimberley

Autumn Open House Party at Grace House , Thursday, November 19th

                Come, Let Us Welcome Autumn with an 

         Open House Celebration at Grace House Retreat

Thursday, November 19, 2015  6:30 to 9:30pm

GRACE HOUSE RETREAT, 29 MORTON DRIVE, BUFFALO NY, 14226

Join us for a casual Open House party of  relaxing chair massages, samplings of Autumn and Holiday Steeped Tea and Grace Houses signature Holiday cookies! We will also be featuring free facials with our Natural Image Care, certified organic skin care products that are guaranteed to make your skin feel amazing! 

We will be taking orders for Grace House Signature Holiday cookie trays to make your entertaining easy and effortless ...

AND 

We will be offering 20% off of our skin care products for yourself or that special someone on your Holiday wish list. 

Here is a list of Grace House Retreat friends that will be serving their gifts to all that attend:

Dennis Knipfing, Licensed Massage Therapist

Katie Thurber, Steeped Tea Consultant

Kimberley Barker Nightingale, Grace House Proprietor, Author, LifeCoach, Skin Care Consultant



RSVP by contacting Kimberley Barker Nightingale at kbnightingale@gmail.com or 716-390-6140.

He Maketh No Mistakes

Today I have a special treat for my readers that was sent to me from my Grandmother this morning.  You see my Grandmother now lives in the Spirit world and I feel her presence more and more each day as I connect to her through my daily meditations.

I was sitting at my dining room table , coffee in hand, in the early morning hours, with just the dim light of the two lamps on my side board. I let the quiet surround me and I picked up the pen. I said a prayer of thanks and started on the page. I thought about my spirit guided meditations over the last few days and I looked up from the page.

And I looked straight at my bookshelf across the room that majestically holds a place in the dining room.  to give it a Hemingway /library feel. Immediately, my eyes fell upon a thick, old book. What was that? I didn't have my glasses on , so I got up from the chair and went to it. My Grandmother's Bible. It was calling to me.

I slid open the glass doors of the shelf and reached for it. It is old with the pages fading to a dusty yellowish/brown color and the black cover having a rough texture to it as I hold it in my hands, has come apart. I carry the Bible with cover and all back to my writing table and I open to the pages that I am supposed to explore. I feel honored to have this book in my hand, a gift from beyond. And I know it belongs on the shelves of this glass enclosed, cherry/brown wooden bookshelf.

She had a message for me and today I share it with you.

                                                   He Maketh  No Mistakes

                        My Father's way may twist and turn,  My heart may throb and ache.

                                              But in my Soul I'm glad I know 

                                                  He Maketh No Mistakes

                         My cherished plans may go astray, My hopes may fade away

                                          But still I'll trust my Lord to lead, 

                                            For He doth know the way.

                        Thou night be dark and it may seem that day will never break,

                                        I'll pin my faith, my all in Him .

                                               He Maketh No Mistakes.

                        There's so much now I cannot see, My eye sight far too dim, 

                         But come what may, I'll simply trust and leave it all to Him. 

                             For by and by the mist will lift and plain it all He'll make.

                                     Through all the way, though dark to me, 

                                            He Maketh No Mistakes!


I have no idea if my Grandmother wrote this or if she copied it from somewhere. It doesn't matter. 

Enjoy! 

And for those of you who would like a nice copy of this to hang on your wall at home, please send me a nice note to my email at kbnightingale@gmail.com and I will send it off to you! 

Love and Light,

Kimberley


 

The Magical Mysteries of Life, Connecting with Spirit

Each day I am awestruck at the wonderment of the Universe/God in my life.  There are little signs that come up throughout the course of the day that tell me that He is listening. He hears my every thought, my every prayer.  Why does it still surprise me when it happens? I don't know. In fact, the messages come quickly and effortlessly almost within 24 hours of my thoughts and I can't even keep up with receiving all the information He is giving me.

Did this always happen and I just wasn't as aware of the spiritual flow of the Universe or was I just too busy with my everyday life to hear Him?

My life is very different today , than it was just a year ago. I spend a lot of time during the day in silence in my beloved home, whereas in my prior life, I was in a corporate office each day, in a tangled , stressed out mess, wondering how on earth I would accomplish all the tasks that were asked of me.

 My days consist of writing, reading, meditating, exercising, taking care of my Airbnb guests and working on my coaching business. It's the life I wanted to create and I am finally here. It was a long time in coming, like ten years! I am happier than I have been in a very long time.

I can hear the voice of God more clearly and easily now and my days of being stressed out have dramatically reduced themselves from what they were over 12 months ago.  In fact, now when I feel like I get too bottled up with emotions that I know are not serving me (or anyone else for that matter) , I take the time to "go within" and meditate. Yes, does it take time out of my busy day? Absolutely! But, I find my life flows better afterwards and I find solutions to answers I need to move my life forward.

We must all take time out of our busy lives to listen to the messages that are given to us. They come in all shapes and sizes. Some come in the form of an email from someone who you follow online, some come in the shape of a book that calls to you in an airport or bookstore and others come to you in the shower! They just pop right into your head! Hahaha..

Life just works so much better when we listen and "go within." Some might read this and say, well it's easy for you to hear them because you are working from home without a lot of distractions. Really? My phone rings too and my emails pop up every two seconds , my family calls and needs to talk about weekend plans, my friends need a favor and my marketing consultant tells me that I need to learn some new software to get into this online world! I don't have distractions?

I do have them, mine just look different than yours!

So, what do I do to keep my channels open? I monitor my feelings. Am I feeling sad, frustrated? angry? If the answer is yes - I know I am off kilter and I need to do something to get myself back in alignment with my "better feeling state." Because you see if I don't feel good, nothing seems to flow right - my business, my relationships, my health.

How do I get myself back into alignment? I do something that makes me feel good. I go get a pedicure! I get a massage, I listen to a motivating You Tube video or I listen to uplifting music, I exercise, but most importantly - I know I need to meditate.

Meditation always gets my head and my soul back into a place of calm and openness. This openness allows the mysteries of life to again begin to unfold and reveal themselves to me. Those tense, bottled up, churning in the pit of my heart and stomach feelings - they just keep my dreams and the good in my life away.

Is it always easy to get back into alignment for me? No. Sometimes it takes a day or two. But let me tell you this - it used to take me a lot longer than that!

I used to be this very aggressive/assertive business woman, out to whip the corporate world. And over the course of the last five years of my life, I knew something wasn't right. I felt my soul tugging at me - saying this isn't you! Stop! Listen!

Listen to me! Take the time and reconnect with your God, your Spirit, whatever you call it. Stop the noise and let me show you how the mysteries of life unfold naturally like the world of nature. There is another way to help the world.

And so, I made the decision on October 31, 2014  to leave the corporate job, I loved in many ways to listen to what God was telling me and to follow a pathway I knew I needed to to follow.

Each day has been a new day full of amazing wonders that reveal themselves to me. I am inspired daily and wish I could write about everything that comes to mind - but alas- the laundry needs to get done! Hahaha!

My dear readers, take the time to listen closely, be aware, take the time to be still. Take a walk, sit down and listen to some classical music. Let God speak to you in quiet hours. He is always there, even when you don't think He is. He just might reveal himself in different forms!

Let the magical mysteries of life unfold , the Universe doesn't operate on the instantaneous world that we humans have created with technology. Connect with God/the Universe and your soul will find peace and calmer days.

Love and Light,

Kimberley

The Pathway to Molding a Creative Life

It's been an interesting couple of days, lots of emotion swirling around from sadness of a friend moving out of town, to disappointment of not meeting my creative/entrepreneurial goals as I had intended over a year ago, to fear of not being able to financially support myself while I continue onward to make those dreams a reality. All of this I knew was blocking my ability to write and that upset me even more.

I yearned to put pen to paper and my hands on the keyboard. It wasn't coming. I did everything that my teachers had taught me about changing the focus of my thoughts and getting out of that emotional state that put me in those places. It has been a struggle to pull myself out of it. Because you see life doesn't always give us a full hour to meditate or to lock yourself in your writing room until some divine inspiration happens.

The laundry needs to get done, guests need to be taken care of , you need to get yourself off the chair and exercise and clean the litter boxes!  Yes, I did all these things as tears of sadness, fear, frustration were churning inside my body and the tissue box was getting emptied.

But I pushed myself through it , honoring all those wonderful emotions that have been given to us as we go through the human experience. Wayne Dyer often tells us in his books and audio tapes, "we are spiritual beings having a human experience." Great! I could do without some of these experiences - thank you very much! Most of all, the experience of heartbreak when you love someone so much, the thought of saying goodbye to them just feels like a beautiful vase, that gets shattered into a million pieces as it falls to the ground.  Well, I don't want to start those tears flowing all over again, I am just starting to feel a bit better today and I need to be writing!

One of the key tasks on my to-do list was to think through my new, creative business model and get back to my marketing consultant/mentor. We talked about a vision board for my business and I had never really thought about that. I had a vision board for my overall life but never really specifically for my business.

So, I set out thinking about that. How do I mix all the creative things I love and want to share with the world into some crazy business model? Mmm.. I am a writer of fiction novels - which I love - creating those worlds that only you dream of , is super fun! I love to bake and cook, I teach people how to create better lives for themselves with their health, careers, wardrobes, etc.and I own a BnB/Retreat. Mmm.. how the heck do you put that all together?

I knew the one thing that always grounded me when I felt like my life was swirling out of control was to bake cookies. And I did - yesterday afternoon. Gluten free chocolate chip cookies, something my guests and friends love. However, I was stumbling through it and ironically they didn't come out as great as they usually do. Wonderful- my go to stress reliever wasn't working!  At least it helped me focus my thoughts elsewhere for a time.

I kept thinking foll about the business model conversation and wondering what does that look like for me? How do I write from the heart to inspire people and create a "business model" from that?

My thoughts went to Joanna Penn, who writes the blog - The Creative Penn. I have been following her for years now and she is truly an inspiration to me as she too has struggled to to finance her writing career and she has been successful! She has so many wonderful non-fiction books and podcasts and blog posts to help writers find their way. You can find her on http://www.thecreativepenn.com/. Please, if you have any aspiration to write, whether it be fiction or non-fiction -check it out, her site is super helpful!

I knew I had downloaded a non-fiction work of hers on becoming an author in this new world of self publishing. I went in search of it and yes indeed, I did have it.

I read through it while eating dinner and contemplated her advice.

I went to bed thinking about it and I got up at 5am this morning thinking about it. The cats were like - hey, why are you up? Great, why don't you fed us while you are at it? I wanted to sit down with pen and paper to see if I could get something written this morning , to see if I could write once again despite all those crazy emotions and thoughts of business models. I dutifully fed the cats and made some coffee. I was determined to write.

I went up to my writing room in the quietness of the morning darkness outside, turned on my desk lamp,.. coffee in hand and picked up a prayer book written by Julia Cameron called Answered Prayers, Love Letters from the Divine. I always randomly open the book to whatever page God directs me with this little book and sure enough, each and every time - he leads me to the page that I need to read most.  The page told me that He hears my prayers even if I don't know how to pray. That He hears me even through my yearnings and my tears. How many times does He have to tell me he hears me? I laughed at that sentence because I knew he was talking to me, telling me - "its all going to be ok." " We have been here before and I carried you through didn't I?" "We got through a house fire together and unemployment didn't we?"

Yes, we did. And so there was my inspiration to write. And I started on my Morning Pages. And the words began to flow.

My words were those of prayer as they have been many times before and suddenly Elizabeth Gilbert popped into my head as I have been reading her new book, BigMagic (http://www.elizabethgilbert.com/). In that book she talks about the fact that although some story line seems like it has been written before or that someone else came up with a similar idea, it has never before been created in YOUR voice, created by YOUR hands. We are all unique and have gifts to share with the world.

I went to my computer and typed in her name. What was her business model? How was she working through the maze of publishing, living life and writing? Well, I clicked on her site and was immediately attracted to her video section and her You Tube video about a book that I hadn't read yet. It is called, The Signature of All Things. I love Elizabeth Gilberts voice, it is very calming to me and when she speaks about the writing life, it all just makes so much sense to me.

I listened to her voice and watched the video and I knew once again, God had directed me to the right place. You see as she explains the heroine in the book, she explains part of herself and part of who I am as well - the joy of getting so engrossed in a project that you have to feel it, you can't just read about it, you have to feel it! " I want to go out and roll around the world I am inventing" YES!  I totally understand!

The video finished and up popped two other pictures for other videos. One of Elizabeth Gilbert and her husband, featuring her on Super Soul Sunday with Oprah and the other picture was of Wayne Dyer and his book The Erroneous Zones.

Now what are the odds that three people who have inspired my work so much would be sitting right there in front of me this morning - Oprah, Elizabeth Gilbert and Wayne Dyer.

Do you think perhaps they are all rooting for me to find my voice in the world? I do. And if Elizabeth Gilbert  could talk to me, I know what she would be telling me.

Get out there.. find your voice. Yes, I know your struggling, scared and uncertain, but you will find your way to the other side of this and you will see, it will be wonderful!

It is my hope that this blog post gives some inspiration to those of you out there who are trying desperately to follow your dreams. Don't give up no matter what. Even if your world seems like it's crashing down around you. It's not! It's the Universe at work! Call on Your Teachers! They appear when you need them!

Here is to your Creative Life!
Kimberley

Men wearing Backwards Baseball Caps on First Dates?

So, I went on a first date with someone last night and to my surprise he greeted me in a backwards baseball cap, a t-shirt, jeans and sneakers. The topper - he was chewing gum!

I was shocked to say the least. I took my time to shower, get nicely dressed in a blue blouse that contrasted with my auburn hair, a nice pair of black jeggings with black boots and a coat that was yellow with ruffles that complemented the blue. I curled my hair and took the time with my makeup.

Clearly he didn't take the time to do much of anything! Immediately I knew that there wasn't going to be a second date! And the date got even more interesting when he said "let's go get a table" and proceeded to walk away from me and sat down. He didn't take my drink with him or offer to carry my coat.

He didn't take notice that the waitress didn't bring me the water I asked for when she brought my wine and he slurped his drink down in less than 10 minutes. He didn't talk much except to divulge to me that he in fact didn't work at a family business as he told me ahead of time - he worked for FedEx.  Now, I don't care if that is what you do for a job, but why lie about it?

He proceeded to ask me if I play darts and I replied " not unless I have had a few drinks." He said "well then order another drink" I don't drink that much and certainly not on an empty stomach, I replied.

He didn't even respond by asking me if I wanted something to eat. He just kind of looked at me and let the silence sit between us. I felt like I had drag the conversation out of him. It wasn't until I asked him about his workouts did he begin to talk. The good news is that he gave me some great information on what I needed to do to strengthen my back and wrists so that was helpful!

I couldn't wait any longer, I had to eat , so I took it upon myself to flag the waitress down and order an appetizer.

The hummus and pita bread came and of course, I asked him if he would like to share and he took me up on the offer!

We chatted a bit more and I just needed to end this evening because it was uncomfortable and he wasn't really asking me a whole lot of questions to get to know me. I had to get out of there! I flagged the waitress down and asked her for the bill.

You guessed it! He didn't offer to pay, nor did he offer to split the bill for the appetizer!

I politely said goodnight and went on my merry way. I was thankful for the information I received about my workouts but decided that there were parameters I needed to set for a first date.

Maybe I am old fashioned, but perhaps men need to understand that women like guys that get dressed to see them on a first date, fifth date, tenth date etc. It's a turn on! Backwards baseball caps, chewing gum, t-shirt and jeans is not a turn on! Nor is not treating a woman like a lady and carrying her drink for her!

And not asking her if she wants something to eat! Way to really make sure you never see her again!

I don't get it? Men could have women eating out of their hands if they treated them right! And I know there are men out there that know how to do that!  Perhaps there needs to be a class that men take to teach them the tips on dating and capturing a woman.

And I am certain that there are men out there who have something to say about first dates and women. I would love to hear them! Tips are always helpful!

Here's to Men that are Classy and take the time to Dress!

Kimberley

On Permission to Live a Creative Life

Over the last few days, I have been reading a book by Elizabeth Gilbert called Big Magic, Creative Living Beyond Fear. At the time I bought the book, I grabbed it to soothe a grieving heart over a friend that is moving away. Has it worked? Somewhat, yes. Each time I think of my friend and begin to cry, I grab the book to focus my mind on my writing life.

Just this morning I read an interesting chapter on Permission to Live a Creative Life. When I saw the title of the chapter - I thought, wow, what an interesting perspective! Intrigued, I read on. Elizabeth Gilbert writes:

                  You do not need anybody's permission to live a creative life. 

She speaks of the influences of our parents. What kind of people were they? Were they afraid to take risks? Were they afraid of what other people were to say if they followed their dreams? Were they rule followers?

It really doesn't matter , she states. If you look back far enough into your family line, you will find people who just loved to make things and spent their lives making things.

"The earliest evidence of recognizable human art is forty thousand years old." It's older than humans tending to their agricultural tasks! Wow.. pretty profound I would say!  What does that say about the human species? We are destined to create, more so than our desire to eat?

Well I can tell you when I am writing and creating, food is the last thing I think about - in fact, when I am in the flow of my writing or decorating my home for the holidays or baking batches of cookies - I forget about eating all together! So, I kind of get this!

Artists and creators don't necessarily have to be DaVinci or Michaelangelo- they can be the piece of pottery you created last weekend or the Christmas decorations you so meticulously and lovingly adorned your house with.

"Keep in mind that for most of history people just made things , and they didn't make such a big freaking deal out of it."

I love that line from this chapter. Especially as I am designing a new, creative life for myself.

"We make things because we LIKE making things." Well, I cannot help but think of my parents when I read this line, because you see my parents have always been "makers" as far as I can remember. Yes, my Dad was a great provider and worked a "regular job." But, he always made time for home renovations and working on his cars. You see, he is an amazing craftsman when it comes to home improvements. I have a fond memory of him knocking a big hole in the wall of my childhood home to make way for a beautiful arched window that would let the sunshine into our small, side entryway.   My Mom and he were always conjuring up some renovations to that house.

My Mom on the other hand, has been writing since I was a child. Essay and prose mostly, and they are beautifully written. She is an amazing interior designer , coming by it naturally - no schooling needed. She is a self-taught seamstress, cook, card maker, holiday set designer and knits beautiful sweaters.

So, do I come from parents who were rule followers or "makers?"  What do you think? Pretty obvious I would say.

In his retirement, my Dad is renovating a beach house that he and his wife just bought and my Mom is teaching herself a computer program, making memory boxes for all of her children and grandchildren. And she is dabbling with a children's book!

"Inspiration works with us," Elizabeth says. Yes, it does, it collaborates with us, calling at our doors to see if we will answer. Will we answer? On the weekends, weekdays, or call "creating" our vocation?

This chapter was so timely for me as I in the midst of designing my own creative life and struggling with what is going to be the primary focus for me? I love to do so many things. I love my writing, I love to bake, decorate, design, I love to help people become the best they can be at whatever they desire in their life and I love to create that "new outfit". And I am a BnB proprietor - which I love. Why do we have to choose one over the other, can we not incorporate all of those things into a life we love? I believe we can. And I am trying to figure it all out.  Perhaps some of these are our vocation and others are our weekend hobbies.

I move through my days, letting my heart lead the way ever mindful of paying the mortgage, asking Spirit/God to guide me. I am grateful to have had this opportunity to share my gifts with the world  and I am so grateful to Elizabeth Gilbert for giving me "permission" to "make things" and create a life I absolutely love!

Here is to all of us! The "makers" of the world. For we all have the ability to be makers! Give yourself Permission as Elizabeth Gilbert has given to me!

Happy Creating!

Kimberley