Monday, February 3, 2020

Just Show Up for Your Friends and Family





Today's blog post speaks deep into my heart. A very dear and close friend has died. I am somewhat speechless yet feel compelled to write this. Perhaps in dedication to him, to his family, to all of us on this planet who hold friends and family deep in our hearts.

This friend , who name was David. No last name needs to be mentioned. He was a kind man who was very successful in life. Yes, in terms of wealth, but perhaps more importantly in terms of his success in raising wonderful children and being a loyal and dedicated friend, a kind heart that would lend a helping hand whenever his friends needed him.

When I got the call on Sunday morning, I felt I couldn't even respond. It was disbelief. It was once again, that ugly, dark , overpowering sense of grief that came flooding back. The one that I have been battling for all of 2019 and into 2020 for loss of my cats of 14 years. And , I am sure the grief over my Mother, who despite the fact died in 2015, I am certain, I still pine for that one more time that I can hear her voice.

I wasn't going to go to the Annual Superbowl party that one of our friends was holding with this very large and amazing circle of friends that this person was a part of. I had much to do at home and wanted to focus on writing .  That call immediately changed my mind and my spirit. This was one of David's favorite parties of the year and oftentimes we would sit together and chat about dating, finances, his healing over his wife who died from cancer. And I knew I had to be with my friends to share in the mourning of our dear friend. You see the funeral home isn't where we would celebrate David, it's the parties and the gatherings we all have that he loved so much and brings us all together.
David was a big fan of friends and family gatherings as am I.

I talked to a few of our friends in the morning, we were all sharing our grief and were looking forward to seeing each other at the game party.  The last call I took before going to the party was one of our friends who is mourning deeply and was having a hard time pulling herself together to make it to the party.  We talked for about 20 minutes and I told her, focus, get your clothes on and get to the party - we all need to be together.

And we both Showed Up. For David. For our friends. For the love we have for one another.

All of us chatted with one another in little circles throughout the house, about David, our memories, our disbelief.

And then before the game started, our Host and friend , Gina, turned the TV down, and said a few words about David and asked for a moment of silence. I asked to say a prayer for David and for all of us asking that his Spirit be with us tonight and always as we continue to gather as friends throughout the coming year and years to come.

I am so blessed to have this large group of friends who loves no matter what. We honored our friend last night, we Showed Up.