Saturday, April 30, 2016
A Man's Dream
Each man has a dream of his own
Who he can be
What he wants to achieve in his lifetime
The dream is made of a series of smaller dreams or goals
that are a step toward the bigger picture
It has occurred to me that while man needs blood flowing
through his veins to sustain life, so too he needs his dream
For without it surely life would have very little meaning.
No goal to reach out for, No purpose to live for
Surely this would be a living death
For worse to me than a death by normal causes!
So , dream on my children, Reach out- Reach ever Upward
And most of all
Dare to Dream
Author : Dawn E. Paluch - Our Mother March 1993
Friday, April 29, 2016
I love the title of this blog. It was an inspiration from one of my Mother's writings. You see that is what she called the pond outside of her log cabin home that she shared with her husband for many years. It was her place for inspiration. A place she loved to be , where she could watch the deer walk in front of their large sunroom windows. And on occasion, there was a bear in the woods that kept company with the woodchucks, beavers, squirrels and various other wildlife.
I remember when she first moved out to the country. I was coming home from a business trip and she picked me up from the airport and we drove straight to her new home. We drove and kept driving. The roads were dark , no streetlights to be had. And I said "Mom, where are we going?, are you serious about this? Really?"
And then we pull off the main road into some woods, down a dirt and gravel road and she pulls up in front of this very small log cabin home. And it was dark! I got out of the car , awe struck at what I saw. I thought she was messing with me. But she wasn't!
We proceeded to walk into this one bedroom , ranch type , very small log cabin. And my "room" was a pull out couch. We settled in for the night and I slept pretty soundly, perhaps it was the fresh air that did it, who knows. For whatever reason, perhaps it was all the animals talking outside as they were greeting the dawn of the new day, I awoke pretty early.
My Mother and her husband were sleeping, so I thought I would take a shower and make some coffee. I went to turn on the shower - no water? What? Mmm.. ok.. so I proceeded to go make some coffee thinking that perhaps there was trick to the shower and my Mother would share that with me when she awoke.
I turned the kitchen faucet and no water - Mmmm..what is going on? Well, this will never do. I needed my shower and my coffee!
My Mother awoke shortly afterwards, hearing me gather my things to go home. I needed to go back to civilization and get a hot shower and steaming hot cup of really good coffee!
What are you doing she asked as she saw that I was preparing my bag. I am going home, this rustic living or whatever this is, is definitely not for me! There is no running water for my shower and no water for coffee!
"Oh , we must of had a storm or power outage or something" " Jim, can get the stored bottles of water we gathered in the plastic pop containers and heat a kettle on the grill. I looked at her in disbelief! "Really?"
"Yeah, it's no big deal" she said very calmly. And my reply was "Mom , why do you want to live out here?, there is no mall within miles, no restaurants, no anything except animals talking night and day out there!"
My Mother laughed and shook her head. Inside her mind, she knew that her family would come to enjoy this gift of nature , that she and her second husband purchased.
Little did I know or the rest of my family know, what memories would be created at Serenity Pond.
From that moment forward, Serenity Pond would be the place her grandchildren learned to fish, where bonfires happened after a day in the woods gathering berries , little children off on their own with their brothers and sisters, with no fears of safety , where wildflowers grew and lilypads drifted in the water.
This would be a place where my Mother wrote some of her finest work, inspired by nature and a place where she taught her family the gifts of Mother Earth, togetherness, peacefulness and where she created Christmas in the Woods.
Thank you Mom, for the Gift's from Serenity Pond.
Kim (and all of your children and grandchildren)
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
As I was getting ready for work this morning, I was drawn to that file of my Mother's writings that is sitting near my coach. And as I read the little pieces of paper wondering what to do with all of them to honor her, she came to me. And here is what she said:
Within the heart lies the wonderous mystery of life,
Be Still, look deep, Listen,
For the voice of one who has loved you always,
Close your eyes, let my face drawn there, appear.
Forever in your memory, hear my voice, wanting my beloved child,
To give you consolation , share your joy and sorrow
And grant you peace.
Look into your Heart Darling,
For there I will always Be, Even when I am no more.
Love , Mom
I am forever convinced that the Spirit of the ones we have loved that have moved on..really do hear us!
You see last night , I walked back up to my office after feeding my cats and the overhead light was on. I thought to myself -that's odd, I didn't turn that on?
I needed to get some tea and I as walked back down the stairs, I talked with my Mother and asked her to speak to me. That I needed her and so did her husband.
And as I was drawn to her writings this morning, this little slip of paper was there. Written in 1995 with my name on it - to discover it the day I needed it in 2016, after my Mom had died.
No one will ever convince me that my Mother isn't with me and watching over me. Am I crying as I write this - oh yeah! Does she know that I am about to publish her work - yes she does.
Thank you Mom.. thank you.. this means so much to me , when I need you so much right now. I love you to the moon and back!
All my Love,
Monday, April 25, 2016
Yesterday, My Mom's husband, my niece and I had dinner together. I love Sunday, Family dinners - they give me such a warm feeling of tradition and togetherness. A time to catch up , a time to just "be" with each other.
We had a lot of laughs! In fact, another patron in the restaurant actually came over to us and told us that we ruined her dinner because we were laughing so loud! How random right? And I felt sorry for her, if she couldn't share in the joy of laughter!
And we cried too.. for the person who wasn't seated there with us. But her spirit was for sure! Every so often in the conversation we would talk about her and I could tell her husband was having a tough day. You see, my Mother asked me to publish her writings not two months before she died. I asked her husband to gather as much of her work as he could find so I could start to get my head together on how to do that.
My Mother , like me, had a file folder of individual pieces of paper where she jotted her thoughts down and she wrote things on her computer. Her husband went through many of those writings yesterday morning and cried in his green house.
As we said our goodbyes and he handed me my Mother's laptop and the folder that contained her writings, I watched him walkaway. He walked alone - without my Mom. Without the wheelchair, without the oxygen tank, without helping her into the truck. And my heart felt so sad.
You see, I am used to living alone without a partner - I have been doing it a long time. Do I like it? Most days I am ok with it, but I would love to have someone to share my life with. Am I used to it? Yes.. But my Mom's husband is not used to being alone and my heart went out to him.
On the drive home, my niece and I talked of various daily life things. I didn't want to focus on my Mom too much as I feel in some ways, we all need to start moving on as best we can.
I settled in for the night to watch my favorite show on the Hallmark Channel and I reached down to the file folder that contained my Mothers writings. And just as I had praised her work as a young girl when I first read them at the age of 12, I admired them now as a mature woman.
Did I cry? Yes.. Was my heart filled with warmth? Yes! There were writings addressed to my brother Scott, to myself, thoughts of her marriages and her sad heart when they ended, thoughts of Mother Earth - which I will definitely share with the world! And the beginnings of her children's book about a WoodChuck!
And as I read through them, I was reminded of something my Mother had said to me when I first started this blog. She said " the torch has been passed - you are officially a writer and a better one that I"
Well, if you were to read the beautiful musings of my Mother - I don't know that one could say I am the better writer.
For the longest time, I never felt that I inherited any of my Mother's craftiness. She was such an artist in every way - she taught herself to sew, to knit, she made greeting cards , she was a great cook, she was a wonderful entertainer, she even taught herself how to use new technology. However, what I do know for sure - is that she gave me her Gift.
Her writings sit in the folder with her laptop, near the couch. I am not quite ready to dig in to create the publishing project of her work and mine - but I am getting close to it.
Thank you Mom for this Gift. I miss you every day - it's hard and I cry a lot but I am also trying to move on.
With Love and so much Gratitude in my heart,
Saturday, April 16, 2016
I just discovered this little gem as I was desperately searching for answers to prevent UTI's without taking a low dose antibiotic. And I came across D-Mannose .
D-Mannose is naturally found in pineapples and cranberries. As most of us know cranberries really help heal and prevent urinary tract infections. However, when taking organic cranberry juice to prevent a UTI - you have to drink an awful lot of it. Have you tasted cranberry juice without sugar - wow! Tart! really Tart!
D-Mannose comes in powder and capsule form and gives you the amount you need without drinking 8 glasses of cranberry juice a day.
I had been drinking cranberry juice after a fun night with my partner along with lots of water and ensuring that you go to bathroom soon after having sex.
But apparently that isn't enough as I had recently experienced some really unusual symptoms that came with a UTI and I was really sick for a whole day and it wiped me out for the next few days.
As I course through the journey of menopause and my body decides to change by the month, I find that my body needs additional help on an everyday basis.
Some articles I have read talk about using estrogen cream topically versus orally to help this. Yep, I am already on bioidentical estrogen and I love it! So, I wasn't quite sure this was the answer for me.
And so , I did what I always do when I need answers - I start researching. And I came across this
supplement. The articles I have read caution those of you who are diabetic to consult with your doctor first before taking this because it appears that it is some type of sugar.
I ordered the supplement and am waiting for it to come , so I can see if this will be helpful.
Vitamin C and a good probiotic is also something that women need who suffer from UTI's. Supporting ourselves with good bacteria is not only good for your intestines, but also good for your kidneys and bladder. Garlic, turmeric, sage, marshmallow root, dandelion tea , ginger and baking soda are also excellent remedies for UTI's when you actually get one. In fact, putting 2 tsp of baking soda in water and drinking it as soon as you feel one come on, is an excellent way to stem the pain. Just sayin' from experience. The turmeric helps with the inflammation as does the ginger. For people with some other health conditions, dandelion and marshmallow root might interfere with some medications from what I understand - so do your research, talk to your doctor and find what works for you.
Reduction in your sugar intake is another prevention key. Mmmm..well, as a baker , I need to double my preventative measures and try to cut down where I can.
It's all about finding our balance and what works for each of us. Some folks are ok with taking a low does antibiotic, whereas I am allergic to most and I don't believe that taking antibiotics on a daily basis is the best thing for me on a long term basis. We are finding that as a society, our dependence on antibiotics is causing the human body to become resistant to many of them And oddly enough, we are turning back to Mother Earth for answers.
Here is hoping that this little supplement and some additional tweeks will help stem the recurrence of these UTI's . I will certainly let everyone know how it goes. I'm not a doctor, I am simply sharing my experience with you and what I have found works for me in my research and trial an error.
To Our Best Selves,